Do you Marilu?

One day in the mid-90s I woke up feeling like I was disgustingly unhealthy. I felt all puffy and gross and hated what I was putting in my body. I called in sick to work and went to the Barnes and Noble in Metairie, La., to look for a book my friend Fran had recommended, “Marilu Henner’s Total Health Makeover” or “The Green Book,” as it is affectionately known by Henner devotees.

“The Green Book” outlines a program of 10 steps you can take to make yourself feel better, look younger, and have more energy. I curled up in a big comfy chair with “The Green Book” and “The Blue Book,” which outlines a specific 28-day program of eating and activities. I was 24 and feeling better with every page. That afternoon, I traded the bookstore for the health food store and stocked my fridge with all the foods I’d need to get started on my new way of living.

I changed my life dramatically. I stopped eating dairy products, chemical-laden processed foods, caffeine, red meat, refined sugar and started food combining (not mixing carbs and proteins). I brought Marilu’s books to the grocery store and educated myself about all types of foods I’d never eaten before. I changed my life.

Needless to say, Marilu has become a sort of personal hero of mine, so imagine my excitement when, at the beach last year, I became acquainted with a woman who happened to be a friend of Marilu. Through this very nice beach lady, I sent Marilu my CD – she’s thanked in the liner notes – and in return she sent me some personally inscribed copies of her books. So nice! Take a peek:

I was even more delighted to hear that she recently married a guy she had a crush on in college, and in their vows, he said he planned to follow her dietary advice. Cute!

Like The Artist’s Way, I’ve given away a bunch of copies of Marilu’s books to people who want to make their lives run a bit better. If the channel surfing gods are smiling down upon me, I’ll even stop to watch her do suggestive pelvic thrusts in “Perfect” (with her ex John Travolta). She just one of those women I have a strange fascination with, and I love that.

sitting in the backseat of your car, i never wanted out

A few New Orleans tidbits:

My buddy Jarred turned into a restauranteur in post-Katrina New Orleans and opened a fun new place where Quarter Scene used to be. Check out this article on eat New Orleans and stop in for lunch or dinner when you swing through the Crescent City. Yummmie!!!

Also, my former editor and lady-lovin’ pal, Melinda Shelton, is one of a few peeps puttin’ on DecaFest in the Big Easy in a few short weeks. Designed to bring a little culture to the fun filth of Southern Decadence, DecaFest will feature a lot of activities geared toward those who might want to take a walking tour, attend a homo book reading, or watch a play or a film before they get snot-slinging drunk!

There’s a lot going on down there, so if you plan to be in town for Southern Decadence, check out one of their events and then you can say you were there first!

One of the book signings/readings will be for "Love, Bourbon Street," a collection of GLBT essays by New Orleans’ writers and friends. Check it out…Even a few adventures by yours truly make an appearance in one of the pieces. Egggads!

but a chair is not a house

The NY Times did a great (i.e. brief!) piece on my favorite book of the year, Fun Home. It’s a shame to say but I’m too lazy to grab the link from my earlier blog entry about the book. Instead, just check out the story on NYT.

Off to a dinner with Sandi Thom, who I’ll also see perform later tonight. I haven’t had a chance to review her CD yet, but from what I’ve heard it should be a pretty colorful evening.

the line that brought me to you will take me away

The New Yorker posted the entire short story of “Brokeback Mountain,” by Annie Proulx. Check it out here before you see the movie next week.

i got the ways and means to new orleans, i’m going down by the river where it’s warm and green

I must admit I got a little chuckle out of this bit of news. I went on several so-so dates with her son Chris back in 2000 — Jaws II on DVD? Nah, buddy, I think I’ll pass –  and so I got to meet Anne a few times. She’s a wonderful lady, much different than I’d imagined, even after seeing her on TV talk shows. She doesn’t come across as an overly serious-type of person. She’s also not creepy, though their house in New Orleans did make me a little jumpy late at night.

Of course, I idolized her for  nearly a decade because I read the first three Vampire Chonicles when I was a late teenager. (There were only three back then!)  It sounds totally cheesy now, but The Vampire Lestat was my favorite book for years. (Maybe it’s how some people feel about the Lord of the Rings trilogy? The homo-eroticism, the alienation, Lestat’s acting out and impulsiveness…And, oh, the complexity of how you could HATE Lestat so much in the first book and then when you understood why he did what he did, after what happened to him, you couldn’t help but love him. It was just so deep; I had never read anything like that before.

My roommate at the time, Aaron, was a painter and had already read the books. He painted a triptych — one for each of the three books. When he moved out, he offered me one of the paintings, and another to our other roommate, Lisa. I took the one he did for "Interview with the Vampire," because it was the least disturbing. I’ve hung it in every place I’ve lived since 1990.

So, all of that to say if anyone can pull off meaningful, interesting and relevatory writing about the life of Jesus, I think Anne’s our gal.

Now, the problem is, who’d want to read it? Not me.